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Stanley Kulaga
In Memory of
Stanley F.
Kulaga
1922 - 2015
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The lighting of a Memorial Candle not only provides a gesture of sympathy and support to the immediate family during their time of need but also provides the gift of extending the Book of Memories for future generations.

Always Be Good to Your Mother and Your Father

"Always be good to your mother and your father," my Grandpa Stanley told me multiple times as I was growing up. "Always be good to your mother and father," he said, standing with my dad, prodding the barbecue fork in my direction for emphasis as the grill sizzled with hot dogs and hamburgers on a summer day in the early 90's at my grandparents' house a block from the ocean in Belmar, New Jersey. "Always be good to your mother and father," he turned and told my sister Julie and I, our Grandma Helen nodding in agreement from the passenger seat, as we sat in the back trying to guess where Old Betsy, his white Lincoln, was taking us on a mystery ride (turned out to be the Keansburg boardwalk) a bit later in the 90's. "Always be good to your mother and father," he instructed on the enclosed porch with a view of a duck pond at the retirement community in Toms River, sitting with my parents, uncle and grandma as my cousins and I came back inside from playing wiffleball after losing the ball to the understory of a massive tree in the outfield sometime in the 00's. "Always be good to your mother and your father," he worked up the energy to tell me from a hospital bed a little after Christmas 2014, shortly before I left to see some bands with my sister Brenda at Asbury Lanes and then fly back to San Francisco. The phrase was repeated countless times between. For the longest time I didn't know why he kept saying it. In my teenage years and early twenties, I thought maybe he should get some new material. But as life got more difficult and nebulous after graduating college, I began to see the value in the nugget of wisdom he shared after every game of "which hand is the $20 bill in?" It wasn't a throwaway line. He wanted me to see that my mother and father gave me the gift of life, and like a way more awesome version of the jelly of the month club (he and my grandma wore out their VHS copy of Christmas Vacation) it was the gift that kept on giving. No matter how hard life got, I could always count on my mother and father. They deserved my best in return. Grandpa, you've taught me so many things, but this will forever be the one that sticks with me. Thank you for your life. We love you and miss you already.
Posted by Greg Kulaga
Monday March 30, 2015 at 10:00 am
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